


あ、こちらこそ

by SugarPineapple



Series: if i were to sit on a cliff overlooking the sea [3]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Gen, Metaphors, No Plot/Plotless, Not Beta Read, POV First Person, Regret, Short, Short One Shot, feelings i guess, unrealistic description of freezing, ”dying” thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-19
Updated: 2020-12-19
Packaged: 2021-03-11 03:40:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28168632
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SugarPineapple/pseuds/SugarPineapple
Summary: Regret.It was all I was left with when the frost choked me, burst forth from my heart and hurt me in the process of creating a little place to protect me.It was all I was left with when the ice took hold of my body and preserved me like some slab of meat.
Series: if i were to sit on a cliff overlooking the sea [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2037535





	あ、こちらこそ

A tingling sensation crept up my arm. Violent shocks of cold leapt across my skin and numbed the nerves just below the surface. The beat of my pained heart slowed as the trickle of tears did, my body wracked with choked sobs and shivers from an enveloping frost, a _gift_ for this very occasion.

I was dying in some form, I _knew_. I was being frozen in time to _maybe_ be retrieved later or be left forgotten, I _knew_. But, how much of this pain was simply physical, I did _not_ know, despite my desperate longing to understand, if only for the sake of knowing.

I thought, I _thought_ I had known that I was ready to face death. It was a necessary and inevitable thing. Yet, the thought of leaving my family and loved ones behind, leaving my home, _hurt_ in unexpected ways. The thought that I would have unfinished business _angered_ me, lit a fire in me that would’ve melted the ice, had it a physical manifestation to call its own.

Oh, how my passion simply _burned_ , vaporising all in my path; hand in hand with the melted frost, one of the essences of life and one of luxury, convenience, and survival, carving a blazing, single minded tunnel of destruction into the very _soul_ of the earth and rock, into the memories of _all_ who bore witness. Yet still, the ice creeped into my blood, breath, and mind, fading and freezing all I could’ve wanted to be and know.

 _I hate you, you did this, you hurt me like this, you ruined everything_ , I screamed with no voice, thought with no conviction. The only thing left was the feeling of regret. Regret that I didn’t do enough, say enough, _be_ enough. Regret that I felt like it was my fault yet wholly not mine when nothing could fully encompasses what went wrong. Regret I didn’t reach out or hold enough in. Regret.

Regret.

Regret.

I at last heard an answer to my wordless call.

 _“I feel the same way. Who would’ve thought? But you’re the only one not making it out of here today._ You’re _the only one who can’t handle it.”_

Then the last of everything became unknown to me.


End file.
